I've Moved.

Dear Reader.

I've moved. I needed a new start. I've moved to word press, partly because everyone I know has moved there as well. For continued viewing please follow the link below.

http://invertedcommas92.wordpress.com/

this is not goodbye Dear Reader, I have apreciated your attention and would love for you to continue reading from me. I hope to work even harder on the next blog and I hope to post more regularly than in the last few months. I hope it shows. I hope to see you there.

My Dad...

Dear Reader.

My dad finished his job today (did I mention that?) he's getting a new job Vicaring in a different parish and all this week we kept saying "you see James you really had a wonderful life" (Its an "It's a Wonderful Life" reference! Shame on you for not knowing!) because everywhere he's been there have been people thanking him for how he's helped them and help them turn their life around and sometimes it was for things he'd almost forgotten about, tiny little things he's just turned up at right moment for and he's just done his job. That's the weirdest thing about my dads job because as a vicar you kind of float in and out of people's lives whenever they meet a cross road. So you're there for weddings and deaths and births and suicide attempts and messy divorces. So sometimes my dad ends up doing the service that becomes important to someone and helps them because you say the right thing to help them through what they're feeling or he ends up doing youth work and helping people then or doing a school assembly that brings people to a different life. A good vicar will be in the background of everyone's life changing moments but almost always like a ghost.
But with my dad its kind of bigger than that he seems to have been in the background of almost every comity in the Calder Valley so there seems to be hundreds of things where he was there with the little suggestion that drove things through or the little idea that someone else took up and changed things and got all the credit for. My dad effected so many lives in so many ways that essentially when the time came for his leaving party it felt like everyone in the village turned up.

I understand why my dad enjoys his job and I admire him for it, but there is no way I would ever want to be a vicar because you seem to just have to know what to do and then you do it.

He'll be missed at Crag and Mytholmroyd but he needs to go find another part of the world to change. I hope they're ready for him...

Weird things that happen on the YouTube.

Dear Reader

I have been watching allot of YouTube series recently and there are a couple of things that I've descorvered which kind of show that the worlds allot weirder than we once thought it was.

the first one is DJ Paige Railstone. Now you may be wondering why this is worthy of mention since its just some artist trying to advertise her work pretty normal but it quickly gets weirder when you find out that the existence of DJ Paige Railstone, from her music career to her personal history to her appearance and personality, is entirely made up. She is a myth made up by "The Vlogbrothers" after they wondered if they could convince the internet that she existed, so they gave her a Facebook account and a fan page and a twitter account and all the usual stuff that musicians have to sell their music and essentially asked everyone who subscribed (commonly known as Nerdfighters) to Google it as often as possible, to the extent that at one point if you typed in "Paige" you would get her on auto fill (now you have to do "Paige r" but its still impressive).

It doesn't stop there after that their subscribers started posting on YouTube. Some just talking about her some posting their music in her name some claiming they've been to one of her gigs and some, where, like this video (which gets 10/10 for both creepiness and impressiveness), they actually claim to be her.

To Quote John Green "Allot of people have been asking me if she's made up, and they've asked whether she's real. We did make her up, but that doesn't mean she's not real."

Either way it does show the power of mass internet subscription. From the Nerdfighter's charitable apeal to making Google auto fill give the word "awesome" whenever you type in the question "is Hank Green..." (the other vlogbrother) to even calling a human being into existence, the masses have the power. (DFTBA!)

the next weird thing is this that two very separate Vloggers (Bryarly Bishop and Charlie of Charlieissocoollike)are now dating and apropriately after a year they both announced it to their subscribers.

Which is lovely because they seem to be such lovely people, they have so much in common and they're both really lucky to have found someone where you kind of just feel that they are the male and female versions of each other (I tried to make that not sound weird but that's how it is). But anyway the weird thing about it is how it feels for the subscribers. Because for me at least, before Charlie posted about her I didn't know about her Vlogg existed at all so it very much feels like the two great crowds of subscribers are now meeting for the first time. And it kind of feels like they're two super defensive parents meeting the new partner and their family at the same time. We're all very happy that Charlie has found love but we're kind of scrutinising her and thinking "if you hurt him! You will pay!" Which, if you think about it is REALLY weird, because I've never met either of them!

The last one is just Genius! There have been a series of someone funny reads "fifty shades of grey" videos but this is the best! The thing is when I heard about it I laughed because I could imagine what a horrible sound it would be but when I got to it, I discovered it was exactly how I imagined it and weirder. Frankly I'm putting it here because I just want everyone in the world to know of its existence (much better than fricking Gangnam Style anyway). I would pay so much money for him to read the entire book.

By the way Reader the reason why I was away for so long was frankly because there are far too many page views on that post I did on ginger people and I worry you only look because its got that picture of Amy Pond which kind of depresses me.

PLEASE SUBSCRIBE!

Venomous

Dear Reader.

Okay, so, a while ago I posted this poem by Tanya Davis called "How to be Alone" and because I've recently just returned to University and I'm a bit of a sap I've been watching it more often than usual. So I was on YouTube flicking through the comments (there was my first mistake) and they were pretty tame and positive as a whole for a YouTube stream as you would kind of expect for this kind of video. Lots of people said it was really good and it helped them and stuff. But then I found this.

Comment

I found this right after my husband passed and it helped me

be ok with been alone. I'd never been totally alone before.

Thanks for helping me thru it.

Reply

You don’t know how it is to be alone, Try being alone all your life and then act like your alone. Other than that, you haven’t experienced shit

Do you ever come across a comment where you absolutely understand where that person's hatred comes from but you still hate that their hatred exists? Because you can just feel how all that loneliness has just fermented into this almost beautifully venomous ball of anger, hatred and jealousy. 

Because, though it might never comes to this, sometimes in your darkest moments you do hear the way people complain about their lives and just think "you have nothing to complain about".

If you really think about it this isn't a very far off mutation of the phrase 

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all"

isn't it? The problem with this is you're never going to meet anyone who has consistently experienced both so both sides are always going to think they have it worse. The people who have never loved at all, have never loved and lost and vice versa (does that make sense? Anyway). At the very least its better to have loved and lost because at least then you know you're capable of finding someone to love and who loves you in return. At least you know you're not broken and there's hope for some kind of love in the future. Where as at some point lonely people just start to think there must be something wrong with them.

The Realisation That Made my Day.

Dear Reader.

I was at the freashers activity fair today hwhich was a bit pointless because it was the same groups as there was last year. But I wash there partly because I was bored and partly because I was looking to see if they had finally established an SCM group because I never want to go back to CU and SCM are generally a bit more liberal, and there was all sorts of groups including the pole-dancing club (people who pole dance not a club where you go see people pole dance you understand) so I was trying to steer clear of that because of the growing crowd of Blokes either staring blankly at the "demonstration" or trying to chat the girls up and I was worried the floor was getting sticky (I know for allot people its not just about sex and all that, but for Blokey freshers just out of Sixth form, it is). And I kept looking and looking for the religious groups becuse they're usually all in the same room and I couldn't find them and I suddenly realised why. Because slap bang in the middle of all the religious groups (and nothing else) from CathSoc to the Islamic Society was placed the Pole Dancing club of Sheffield.

It was such an awkward moment of realisation when you see these women standing in this sea of religious people glaring and almost audibly thinking "are you testing me Satan?". I had to leave because I just got the giggles.

Now I hate to make generalisations about religious people because as I've already said they're often wrong and have people who are strongly the exception to the rule. I don't know what kind of Venn Diagram you could make of students who are strongly religious and students who want to take up pole-dancing but I bet the segment where it crosses over is pretty small compared to, maybe religious people who are politically active and even if there are lots of them I doubt they want to make it a one stop shop and sign up for it in front of all the other religious students. I'd imagine very few people think when they're talking to someone from the CU "oh that reminds me I need to sign up for pole-dancing" so what fresh madness possessed the organisers to do this what link do they have that I just don't get? Especially since in one of the other rooms was almost every other kind of dancing!

They didn't have CSM (*shakes fist*) so I suppose I'm going to have to be a godless heathen for the year and only hang around with Christians on Sundays.

I AM DAVE EXCLAMATION MARK YOGNAUGHT AND I HAVE FINALLY BOUGHT THIS GAME!!!

Dear Reader.

I actually bought and download a copy of the game Minecraft recently. If you've been reading recently I did a post where I talked about my obsession with watching people play Minecraft (the Yogscast mostly) and never actually doing it myself. But now I have it! Which might explain why haven't been bogging as much recently because all I'd have to say about my day would be "I did some farming today, I built a wall, then I finally finished getting the bits together that I needed for that nether portal I've been trying make", which would be rather dull, "a gaming blog" isn't really what I'm going for. but I will talk about it in relation to something my dad asked me the other day. I was playing Mine-Craft and he looked over my shoulder (not exactly used to me being a gamer) and he asked me what I saw in such an old fashioned looking game. I shall have this post as my answer.

1. Despite it's pixelated look and cubic stile its huge. In fact its infinite. The more you walk the more that the world randomly generates (while still remembering where you've been,) so that just drives you to explore more and more both up in the sky and underground and of to other universes and that just plays to human nature.
2. Like real life, you can almost play it however you want. You can spend your time farming wheat and animals or you can spend your time building houses and forts and art or you can spend your time digging down into the earth or you can spend your time hunting and killing monsters. The only rule of Minecraft (for survival mode at least) you have to survive. Beyond that there is a point where you begin to understand what it means to live and use your time efficiently in this Minecraft world (Minecraftia is the most common word I think).
3. It's scary. Surprisingly so. In fact it really plays very hard on childhood fears. The monsters only spawn in darkness meaning that often they jump out from the darkness. This game teaches you to be afraid of the dark. Its also a little bit scary because the whole idea of the thing is in the game you are the only person in the entire world (except the villagers who just seem to stare), and yet there are some structures (aside from the Mob villages) which spawn all by themselves. There's something slightly creepy about mining around and then suddenly coming across another mineshaft complete with roof supports and broken mine cart tracks (who put them there?).

Aside from the dangerous ones like the Creepers who's attack involves blowing itself up, some of the monsters are actually pretty scary in themselves. There's this one called an Enderman (based on the indie game "Slender" which is also fucking terrifying in itself) who will remain docile and passive until you look directly into is eyes it will run at you screaming. If you attack it, it will teleport (usually behind you) and will continue to attack you and hunt you down until either you or it dies. Just because you looked at it. Frankly monsters are partly scary in this game because every time you're killed you loose all the items you're carrying and you invest allot of time on that.
4. Its very Indie this is good because;
A. It encourages universe hacking. By that I mean because its an indie game there are some useful glitches still keep in that make life considerably easier which are in no way realistic however the creators still keep them in.
B. it encourages an insane number of mobs that often attract the owners attention and actually end up in the main game.
5. Herobrine.

There are hundreds of theroies around this character (or mob or monster or myth). Some think that he was a miner in the game before the game was released who now roams the land either as ghost or demon searching for his usurper to get his revenge. Some think Herobrine was the name of the game creator's brother who died tragically and now lives on as a ghost in his brother's game. Some think the entire game is actually all a dream created by prisoner who is being tortured and Herobrine is actually the character's subconscious and when arrives he will call on the player to "wake up".

But here's the thing Herobrine is entirely a myth! Entirely made up by fans of the game even down to the way he looks. there has never ever been a confirmed sighting of Herobrine and the creators of the game deny ever putting him in any of the game patches. Here's a kind of creepy quote from the creator Notch.

The Herobrine stuff is awesome and kind of scary at the same time. It really shows how little control a content producer has over the content.

I've publicly told people there's never been any such thing as Herobrine, and that I don't have any dead brothers, and that letting too many animals die in lava is a fool proof way to summon him but that you don't need to be afraid of him. He only means well, he's looking out for you, trying to warn you of the dangers you can't see. There certainly are NO physical manifestations of Herobrine that will sneak out of your computer if you leave Minecraft running at night, looming over you as you sleep with his pale eyes inches away from your face, as he tries to shout at you to wake up. Sometimes you wake up with a jolt, and he's gone, and all that lingers is the memory and faint echo of his wordless screaming. Of course it was just a dream. There's no way a morally dubious ghost with a god complex could at any point decide to haunt the children who play my game "for their own good", as there is NO SUCH THING. etc etc

Now you may be wondering why I put this last one in because isn't part of the game but a game has to be really big and scary and challenging and real if, out of the control of the creators, an entire ghost story myth can be created by its players.

Dear Mitt Romney. It's not funny any more.

*Sigh*

Dear Mitt Romney.

This is not funny any more! You have just made so many stupid slip ups that, I am really starting to worry about your mental health.

What were you thinking? What were your advisers thinking? What thought could have possibly possessed your brain that made you think that saying you don't care about 47 percent of the american public was a good idea?

I think I might have about the same chance as becoming president as you do. I, a British, labour supporting, borderline socialist, liberal, Darwin believing, Christian, at the age of nineteen believe that I might have the same chance of becoming president as you do. Or, at the very least, I could give better advice on public speaking than your people did.

1. when on a diplomatic (ass kissing) trip to Britain for the Olympics don't say that you think its going to be a failure (that's our job!)

True the British public weren't feeling too good about the Olympics either, but if you start saying it too they will rain down on you with fury and anger!

2. Even if you say "who cares? fuck the planet" in a nice way there are still going to be people who notice what you're doing.

3. You are only a Mormon try to not sound like you're an alien that has replaced the "real" Mitt Romney on behalf of the body snatchers.




Actually I think I might know what you were thinking. The 47 percent video was taken at a fundraiser. That means that the Democrat party wants money for their election campaign so they invite a lode of rich people and businessmen to these things so they can listen to you and give money if you're doing what they want you to do and generally saying "fuck the poor" (Corrupt? No! Not at all! Everyone does it!). At this point in you're life you believe there is no possibility at all that the "unwashed masses" are actually watching. Which may show that you and your advisers know nothing of the modern world. We are always watching so you  always have to be on, every man with a camera phone can be a spy for the media and we are everywhere!